Saturday, August 21, 2010

"Everybody Needs a Rock"

"Everybody Needs a ROCK", the name of a children's book that one of my yoga students gave to me recently, begins like this:

"Everybody
needs
a Rock.

I'm sorry for kids
who don't have
a rock
for a friend.

I'm sorry for kids
who only have
TRICYCLES
BICYCLES
HORSES...

That's why
I'm giving them
my own
TEN RULES

for finding
a
rock...

Not
just
any rock.
I mean
a
special
rock
that you find
yourself
and keep
as long as
you can--
maybe
forever..."


I have shared my life over the past 12 years with just such a rock. I met him first, when the birth of my son required a complete sacrifice of my numbed out psyche; in order to raise my new boy in a safe, nurturing way. It was my first experience, with the power of the mama bear inside me, that would require a profound "shedding" in order to stand as my son's mother--awake and fully present...a living woman, for the first time.

The journey, that is as instinctual as a mama bear awakening in spring from a long hibernation, brought me to a place where I first stumbled onto my rock. Let's call him...Rex Kocherhans. A lovely rock, solid, steady, yet shockingly soulful, warm too--like he's been basking in the light for a very long time...this is a rock that looks back at you! My response to our initial meeting was: "there you are!" (it was like meeting my twin for the first time).

We spent three years together, my rock and I, helping my mama bear eyes come out of the cave, adjust to the light, and find the deep soothing timbre of my true voice...he was such a good rock... Eventually though, a nudging had stirred deep inside both him and me, that told us it was time to set my rock down on this path, yet we always knew we would cross it again, in a different light and season.

Several years later I found myself placed right next to my rock again. It was a such a good fit, this rock in the palm of my hand, as he welcomed me over the threshold of his cave, into a whole other kind of light. One that shined out from us together, as he would help people (the ways he helped me), find healing of the mind; the gentle tap of his marker on the white board, through my wall. I loved the sound of his muffled voice helping them awaken to their truth as we did our work side by side...

On my side of the wall, in a new kind of cave, I shared with my rock, I would help some of those same people, to awaken their body more fully to it's measure... He helped the mind and spirit/I helped the body and soul...Between the two of us, we made a great rock. I loved it so very much!

Most mornings my rock would stomp toward me, with such a great rocky grin from ear to ear, and envelope me in his husky bear squeeze. This rock was so very grounding, and each time he did this, he made every cell of my body smile from ear to ear right back at him...

So my sweet baby boy had opened my eyes, and set me on the path where I stumbled upon this lovely rock, who helped me adjust to the light...And now, even though my rock has recently crossed over onto a whole other kind of path, where I can't quite see him the same as before, I am humbled, in such a sacred way, by just how grounding his presence with me still is; just as husky, just as soft, just as warm and kind, just as loving, staring back at me with new eyes of his own this time... And as I reflect on my lovely rock, I love how clear it has become that my sweet baby boy, and my big husky rock, both had a plan for me on the path before this one, and that they just may have planned this out together a very, very, long time ago.

So tonight, I thank the Savior who gets this whole thing, in ways we can't always see on our path, but is kind enough to place all sorts of rocks on our way. Thank you again, my still so solid, Eternally lovely, BELOVED ROCK.

4 comments:

Danielle said...

This is absolutely beautiful, Syl! the metaphor of Rex as a rock is so fitting. He was my friend and my constant for 19 years. He healed me in ways I can't explain. You have done the same for me over the last 5+ years. The placement of your offices was fate. I am one of many who was made better by the joining of the gifts of both you and Rex in that little upstairs annex in Cottontree Square. My heart, soul, and mind owe much to my two friends who stand strong and true...like mountains.

Sirpa Grierson said...

Very profound, Syl. I love the rock metaphor and agree that we are not alone on this journey. In Manchester, England, several years ago, a woman in the airport lounge came up to me to say that she had a message for me: people are set in our path for three reasons, to teach us, to help us heal, or for us to teach. She said that we need to be awake to these possibilities in each interaction. May we be open to others with abundance :)

Mary Anne Komar said...

Dear Syl, thank you for a lovely posting, it's amazing how people ome into our lives like the tide. You were meant to carry on in a gentle way ,for yourself, his guidance. The veil is thin!

Anonymous said...

You don't know me.It must have been fate that I was looking up some information and I saw your name again. I am a friend of Danielle and Rex's. I went to your site and then now to your blog. Rex was a MOUNTAIN for me. He was my constant for many years as well. I will always feel it was Rex and the Good Lord that SAVED me. It sounds like it was fate that the two of you were placed together too. I wished I had seen him again before he went to the other side but I still draw upon his friendship and strength always. He is one of my MANY angels. He is still here in spirit for sure! He left a wonderful legacy and has touched and helped change the hearts and souls of many.